Russian Roulette
by scentofautumn
Summary: She knew. Knows..more so now than before. He hadn't had a problem before, had shown it on multiple occasions and she'd thought nothing of it. Felt it. Never before had she been the least bit terrified..not even when nature won out and she came as close to death yet again as she had before. {Bella x Jasper, Nsfw, Darksper, Possible PB&J}
1. Take a Breath

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, I'm just messing with what was provided. I appreciate all reviews and creative criticisms. This story will contain questionable themes and situations that you may find you are unable to handle. Triggers will be tagged at the beginning as best as I am able but there is no guarantee that I will be able to tag everything. Consider this your warning.

~o0o~

She knew. Knows..more so now than before. He hadn't had a problem before, had shown it on multiple occasions and she'd thought nothing of it. Felt it. Never before had she been the least bit terrified..not even when nature won out and she came as close to death yet again as she had before. It seemed that she always landed here and not for the first time, she wondered if it was simply fate that loved playing games with her.

The sight of his eyes gave him away. The whispers and hisses of **monster** and **atrocity** and **murderer** rang in her ears as she stared at him from across the room. He was speaking...directly to her and none other. Just as he stared at her..and none other. _Take a breath, take it deep. Calm yourself. _

It was an order. The softly spoken words left no room for argument and she felt a shiver race down her spine. Her heart was beating so hard that she felt as if everyone in the room could see it. It was only a given that they could already hear it. Crimson. His eyes reflected his choice and now with his sickly twisted grin and southern drawl he gave her orders. She began to sweat, terror filtering through for the first time since she came in contact with any of them. See Edward? She had a sense of self preservation...perhaps a bit too late but it was there none the less.

Briefly she wondered if praying would help? Closing her eyes? Or should she do what her instincts were screaming at her and run? No. It would do no good. It would be mere seconds before she was nothing more than a red stain on Esme's perfect carpet. The others knew...his scars told them. That he was here now meant he never lost. It was a terrifying thought and yet everything seemed to be happening in slow motion. Alice stood off to the side, Rosalie and Emmett and Carlisle all standing at points within the living room that she knew would do nothing if he decided to come after her. They were all too far away...and he was freshly fed.

Another beat of her heart...it was nearly painful and she drug in a painful gasp of air with his next command. Breathe. She was mesmerized. This had never happened with any of the others. Never happened with Edward.

_Bella._

That southern drawl snapped her out of her reverie and she took him in from head to foot and back again. Boots, black and well worn. Jeans...a bit dirty with a blood stain on one knee. Black tshirt..v neck and pulled taut over muscles she'd not realized he'd had. Blond hair..curled...messy..not perfectly coifed like all the others. His smile...feral and a tad unhinged with the way his canines were longer than the rest of his teeth. The others didn't have teeth like that. It had to be just him.

Just him.

Jasper.

_Bella._

He was calling her name again, his hand lifting for her to come closer even as the others in the room. The wanna be humans; screaming and wailing and ordering her not to make another move. Another move? She'd taken a step.

~o0o~

The sound of a car door being slammed woke her out of a dead sleep; as if a gunshot had gone off, her body soaked from head to foot in a cold sweat. A dream. It was all a dream and yet her body..despite the uncontrollable shivering, was throbbing with a hidden want that she didn't understand. It left her breathless. Grasping at straws as to why she was dizzy and aching and wanting nothing more than to do exactly as she was told.


	2. I don't mind at all

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, I'm just messing with what was provided. I appreciate all reviews and creative criticisms. This story will contain questionable themes and situations that you may find you are unable to handle. Triggers will be tagged at the beginning as best as I am able but there is no guarantee that I will be able to tag everything. Consider this your warning.

~o0o~

That morning didn't offer any distraction from her traitorous thoughts and..not for the first time..Bella silently thanked whoever was listening that Edward wasn't able to read her mind. If he'd been able to take a peek, he'd have been appalled by the sheer lack of thought that centered around him and was taken up by someone else. Someone whom she wanted to hold her down, grip her hair and ride her into the mattress. Bella had never been an overly sexual person..normal hormonal urges excluded. But her dream had borne something hot and hard and heavy in the center of her chest that had settled all the way into her lower abdomen and made her throb. Bella felt as if she was toting around another forty or fifty pounds and her shoulders slumped forward as she finally made it to her truck.

_Truck?_

Looking down she took in the dark wash skinny leg jeans..the brown Doc Martins and her black tank...and the flannel, she realized she'd dressed and eaten breakfast on auto pilot. Alice hated them. Bella, however, loved her well worn flannel shirts and made it a point to wear one at least once a week to school so Alice would have more to complain about. It was amusing to see the look of horror followed by the wrinkle of the psychic pixie's dainty nose. This morning it was a red and brown and cream flannel that she'd seen Charlie wear the winter before. Slowly she took a deep breath and let it out before cranking up and pulling out to begin her journey to the halls of hell that was Fork's High. The trees seemed greener today than the day before as she drove and Bella found herself taking in the beauty of the forest..the wet pavement..and she rolled down her truck window to take another deep breath. It was such an interesting thing...breathing. She hadn't really noticed it until this morning; the way it would fill her and bring in the most interesting scents. Pine, rain on the pavement, dirt...she could smell dirt! It took quite a bit for her to enjoy the simple quiet that was Forks but when she did...it settled something within her that was all flower child. Thank you Renee.

~o0o~

The parking lot was filled with students...loiterers. _Victims. Heroes. Popular. Unpopular_. Gods it all seemed so mundane and pointless in that moment. "Bella." The sound of her name made her jump and she turned her coffee brown hues to the perfection that was Edward Cullen. The normal stutter her heart gave when she saw him never made an appearance and for once..she didn't want to see him today. It had been getting harder to face him each and every day. For the sake of not hurting his feelings, she gave him a smile and rolled up her window as sprinkles rained down and opened her door. "Hey Edward. Have a fun night?", she spoke softly and climbed free of her beloved truck. Oh how Edward hated that truck. _Suck it...or not...you'd probably lose it and kill me._ He'd gone hunting and hadn't been able to come stay in her room. The look he gave her was telling her something..what she didn't know. It was a given that he wouldn't leave again. Not after her attempts at saving his life and subsequently being exposed to the Volturi. _Good going Edward, nice work, expose your human girlfriend and yourself for breaking the law_. "It was alright. Short and sweet and we were back in no time. Did you rest well love?", his voice was sweet as honey...and as sweet as his scent. Edward was always a mix of talcum powder, honey and something that reminded Bella of Grandma Swan's perfume. Old people smell. Bella laughed low and nodded in answer to his question, not willing to bring up her dream of Jasper and how she'd wanted to climb all over that Cowboy and save a few horses a hard ride. **Bad Bella. Very bad Bella.** "It was alright. The thunder and lightening kept waking me up but I got enough sleep for the AP History test today." There was that look on his face again. "Listen..Bella..." _Great. Here we go._ "I've had to make a change of plans. Carlisle, Alice and I are heading up to Alaska for a few weeks. There's a situation with the Family up there and we need to go handle it." _Weeks?!_

Now she was confused, they'd made plans to go to Port Angeles to the bookstore nearly two weeks ago. A new shipment of books was coming in with a few titles Bella hadn't heard of and she'd saved all she could from Newton's to afford the trip. "You're backing out?" His flinch told her more than his words could, "Come now love, don't be like that. I was asked to come along and I can't turn them down. Carlisle asked for my help." "Well is Esme going?", she asked, slightly put off that he only just spoke with her about this now. Edward shook his head as he answered, "No Bella. Esme is staying here. Rose and Emmett and Jasper are staying as well. Why don't you ask Esme to go to the bookstore with you?"

"Or **I** could drive you."

That drawl sent a shudder down her spine and Bella hoped and prayed to all that would listen that it hadn't shown. Schooling her features, yet her emotions were in turmoil, she turned to look at Jasper with a small smile. It was as genuine as she could manage. Edward's voice almost ruined it, "I don't think that's..." "Okay. That's fine. It's just there and back if you don't mind?" Bella had cut her boyfriend off and could feel the glare he was giving her. Maybe jumping at the chance to be alone with Jasper after that dream wasn't the best idea. But the thought of being able to talk to him without the overbearing Shakespearean throwback or the fortune teller was too good to pass up.

The smile that curled Jasper's lips was reminiscent of the one she'd seen in her dream and for the first time, she noticed that he didn't flash his teeth. It wasn't anything more than a simple pulling of his lips. Bella's need to see his teeth was an imperative now. "I don't mind at all Miss Bella."

The bell rung and the spell was broken as Edward took her arm and led her into the school and she was forced to rip her gaze from the Southerner.

_"What were you thinking?!"_


	3. What's good for him

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, I'm just messing with what was provided. I appreciate all reviews and creative criticisms. This story will contain questionable themes and situations that you may find you are unable to handle. Triggers will be tagged at the beginning as best as I am able but there is no guarantee that I will be able to tag everything. Consider this your warning.

~o0o~

_"Sherman's March, cutting a path through Georgia and the Carolinas, is among the most symbolically potent events of the Civil War..."_

Bella tuned it all out. The teachers voice was so monotone and he kept droning on and on about things she'd already read and written about. Testing time was always Mr. Boland's chance to pick out his favorite parts of history and commence trying to shove it into their brains via a verbal battering ram.

"Complete and utter idiot."

The words broke her out of her trance and Bella cut a sideways glance at Jasper. He'd chosen the desk directly next to hers today as opposed to his usual seat at the back of the class. A small part of her swelled and lifted with happiness that perhaps he'd made the change strictly for her...but it could be that he didn't want to have to argue with Ben Cheney about already being in his seat. "He has a teaching degree," she murmured with a slight lift of her lips..knowing he'd hear her. The raise of a brow in her direction told her that he had and then the mild wave of amusement that washed over her told her what Jasper thought about that deduction.

Bella had only felt Jasper's influence a few times and each time it was easier to realize than the last. The artificial feelings were so close to her own that she'd had to learn to basically...taste them. Her own emotions were usually run by her heart and not her head..but these...when Jasper used his power..it was almost a mental compulsion to feel whatever it is that he wanted you to at the moment. Briefly she wondered if it was a chemical reaction. Pheromones that no one could detect.

Turning her head back to the teacher at the front of the class, Bella valiantly endeavoured to look like she was taking notes. The test for today had come and gone and now they had nearly a half hour to just sit and listen. Persistent in her mission to ignore the low burning embers settled in her abdomen, she'd chosen to act as if the dream of Jasper had never happened. "I have seven," was the low, drawling response and Bella nearly snorted into her paper. "Well, you've been around considerably longer than he has and I'd wager that at least three of those were completed via correspondence," she whispered back. The most spine tingling chuckle met her comment and Bella sucked in a soft breath.**Oh**..._Jasper laughed_. She made Jasper laugh. S_top being so damned happy about it Bella!_ **Bad Bella! Down!** "Miss Swan!"

Wide eyed, she lifted her head to stare at a rather furious and quickly reddening Mr. Boland. "Savannah, Georgia," she automatically hurled from her mouth in the hopes it was what he was looking for. Slowly he returned to what seemed to be a calm demeanor and gave a nod before turning back to the board. "Niccccceeee," Jasper hissed next to her ear. Deer in the headlights was her best impression it seemed because she jumped just as the bell rang and Jasper pulled back as if he hadn't just been mere inches away from her throat. Oh god she was hot. _What the hell?_ Brow furrowing, she looked up at Jasper as the vampire stood and sent a look from head to foot over her and Bella suddenly felt very **very** exposed. "Until tomorrow morning Isabella. See you at nine," he rumbled lowly and then was gone.

_What __**was**__ she thinking?_

Surely she wouldn't be able to handle being alone with Jasper for so long? Thirty minutes to Port Ang and then back again? Perhaps he would follow her around the bookstore? _Damn damn damn_.

Quickly she gathered her things and began packing her messenger bag. Alice and Edward had left at lunch so there was no one to meet her at her locker and the walk to her truck was quiet as well. The fact that Edward had refused to explain to her exactly what was wrong with the Denali Coven had her on edge and she clenched her jaw. Alice had downright refused to even look at her due to the flannel she was wearing. What kind of friend does that? "I'll wear what I damn well please."

Bella's phone buzzed in her pocket and she withdrew the device to see a new text from a number she didn't know.

'You tell em lil bit.' -P

P? Who the hell was P? Looking up, she scanned the car park in an attempt to see if P was somewhere in the crowd but she couldn't see anything. Just the normal amount of students..Emmett and Rose leaning against the Jeep...and each other. Then Jasper...

He was staring at her. The intensity left her suddenly breathless and Bella's dream flashed before her eyes and she desperately wished his eyes were crimson...despite what that would mean for someone else. Jasper's normal attire of khaki's and sweater vests made her angry. She knew he hated them, his nose wrinkled every time Alice would open up a bag of newly acquired items for him. The same way the pixie's nose wrinkled when she wore one of her flannels.

Flannel.

Bella's sudden idea was backed up with another buzz of her phone. 'Go for it. Do it. Now.' -P

She gave a nod as if this was all the sign she needed. P was obviously a vampire and Bella silently hoped and prayed it wasn't Alice. Then again, Alice wouldn't let her do what she was about to. Determination flowed from every pore as she tossed her bag into her truck, unbuttoned Charlie's old flannel and walked across the parking lot to where Jasper stood. Without a word, Bella reached out to a surprised Jasper and began pulling the sweater off of him to reveal a black vneck tshirt underneath. Perfect. Her flannel was held out with continued silence..which was expounded upon with the open mouthed looks from Em and Rose and everyone else who had seen what she was doing. Jasper took the long sleeved shirt with a raised brow. "Put it on." His eyes were darkening rapidly..with hunger or some unnamed emotion she didn't know but Bella fought a wide smile as he did as she told him and slid the flannel on and did the buttons.

Turning her head, she caught Emmett's gaze...and his wide smile. Even Rose seemed to be grinning and she turned and headed for her truck...but not before tossing the sweater into the woods beside the parking lot. "Don't wear those anymore Jasper," she murmured while walking away.

He heard her...and he'd listen.

If he knew what was good for him.


	4. Panic

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
>Thanks so much for the reviews! I'm sorry I'm so slow with updating! Being a mommy and working full time is hard ya'll!<p>

~o0o~

The panic attack didn't hit Bella until she was nearly halfway home. The fact that the idea had been backed by some unknown entity...most likely a vampire given the fact that she didn't know the number..couldn't see who had sent the message and they knew what she was doing at any given time..didn't help in the least. Even the smallest clues now pointed to the possibility. Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she struggled to retrieve it while sitting at a red light. 'Ding ding ding. We have a winner!' -P

So it **was** a vampire. P. The vampire's name began with a P? She didn't know of anyone. Maybe they worked with Victoria? No. She was a pile of ash in the woods. But that had been months ago, graduation was week after next. A honk behind her made Bella jump and she put the phone into the passenger seat and made her way back home. She'd stripped Jasper in the parking lot...oh god. Tossed his sweater out into the woods and made him wear her flannel. Something visceral within her cheered at this and she squashed it quickly. Jasper wasn't hers. She was Edward's and this could not happen. No way could she harbor wants and desires for anyone else than her...fiance. But that dream...Gods that dream. What was it about that dream that made everything about Edward seem wrong? His overbearing attitude was slowly becoming an issue. He never let her make her own decisions...as if she were an unruly child and he the ever strict father. It was a load of crap.

She didn't want to be married...yet. The thought of it sent her spiralling into a vortex of self doubt. Why exactly had she agreed in the first place? It had all boiled down to wanting to be with Edward for forever..but initially it had been his counter proposal to her wanting to be intimate. Bella sat lost in thought as she pulled into the driveway and cut the engine. It wasn't raining anymore and the cab had already begun to cool. Forcing herself out into the chilly air and quickly into the house..dinner took over for long moments as she prepared, cooked and plated the baked chicken ziti and garlic bread.

"Looks good Bells," Charlie muttered as he came down from upstairs. He'd been really sick lately..cough and fever. Carlisle had been making house calls for almost a week now...but he was gone to Alaska for a few weeks hadn't Edward said? What about Charlie? "Thanks dad. How're you feeling?" A twitch of his mustache met her question but he tried to smile and cleared his throat. "Better...still feel like I have an elephant sitting on my chest but I'll be okay. Just gotta sleep sitting up." Worry took over her features and it must have been obvious because her dad charged headfirst into eating dinner with gusto. It was as if to say, 'See? I'm good. I can feed myself. Stop worrying.' "Well if it gets worse we'll take you to the hospital." A nod met her words and she took her seat, picking at her food as she lost herself in thought once more.

The dream that night before had been a first. Of course she'd thought of Jasper before but never in more than in passing. Edward made a point to keep them seperated and Alice always seemed to have something for her and Jasper to do when Bella came around. As if she was scared of him. That wasn't a problem and she didn't blame him for his reaction at her birthday party. A party that she hadn't wanted anyway. But he was a vampire for gods sakes...they lived off of human blood instinctually! Animal blood was a choice! His own hunger on top of the other vampires in the room goaded him into a natural reaction..there was no way she could blame him. Not to mention that she was Edward's singer!

The sound of Charlie getting up to go watch the game tore her from her reverie and Bella was surprised to look down and see her own empty plate. Clean up was quick and then she was murmuring good night to a sleeping Charlie in his recliner...huddled up in an electric blanket to ward off the chill of illness.

Her nightly ritual of a shower and then clean pj's was done far more quickly than she thought and Bella inwardly cringed at her eagerness to fall asleep again. Maybe the Jasper dream was a one time deal? She didn't think her heart...or the rest of her for that matter..could take it.

The mere thought of it sent a heated shudder down her spine and she turned to her window, opening it up just a crack to let in the cool Autumn air. With a soft sigh she shuffled back to her bed, cutting off lights and climbing into bed. It was all Bella could do not to bury her face in her pillow and scream from sheer frustration. Her mind was so consumed with Jasper..and it wasn't for the first time that she was glad that Edward couldn't read her mind. "Oh shit," she groaned. The thought of spending the day with Jasper tomorrow...she was both terrified and excited at the same time.

Closing her eyes, she gasped as a flash of crimson hues filled her mind, followed by a heated tightening low in her abdomen. Pressing her thighs together she whimpered at the wetness gathered there. "He just...doesn't look right." The words filtered into the empty room with a harsh finality that had Bella considering her stance on human drinking vampires. Jasper should have red eyes...something deep within her lamented the fact that he didn't. Always in the background, the Southern Vampire had always been a curiosity that Bella wasn't allowed to explore. It wasn't fair.

A wave of lethargy hit her, the days events catching up with her as well as the less than stellar sleep the night before, and she closed her eyes, relaxing into the bed and belatedly tugging a fleece blanket up and over.

~o0o~

_Take a breath. Calm yourself._

_Bella couldn't see, complete and utter darkness that covered her like crushed velvet. Heart pounding in her chest she drew in deep, steady breaths and tried to get her bearings. _

_Close your eyes...sometimes it helps._

_Cold. It was shocking in its intensity and she nearly cried out before it gave way to a lukewarm touch. The roughened pads of fingers danced along her spine and she instinctively arched into the touch...chasing the sensations it evoked. A low rumble of laughter...dark and amused...reached her ears and it was then she finally forced her eye lids open. _

_Jasper. He was standing across the room again. The other Cullens crying out for her as that same set of fingers danced along her spine. But if Jasper was over there..._

_"__**Jasper**__." Eyes wide, endless pools of chocolate stared at him in shock as strong fingers wrapped around her hips. Who was behind her? Edward was crouched...growling and snarling..venom dripping from his lips as the unknown male behind her made contact with her skin. The crimson eyed Jasper watched with heated amusement, eroticism written in every line of his body just as Bella could feel in the one pressed against her back. Arousal nearly brought her to her knees and she gasped. Jasper wanted to touch her too...she could see it in the way his hands clenched at his sides._

_"Don't worry darlin'." The unknown male behind her brushed the sensitive shell of her ear with his lips. "It'll all be over soon...Isabella..."_


End file.
